Bare in Locs and Words

Whew! Who knew that I’d be away for almost a year. Life took turns that were both expected and unexpected. 

In early November 2024, I visited Houston, Texas with my lil’ 2+ year old son. It was an interesting experience travelling with a toddler. I had fears that he’ll throw tantrums at the airport and on the airplane that would embarrass my shy and introverted nature but I was pleasantly surprised. He was the PERFECT travel buddy. He was as excited as I was to visit somewhere new. In preparation for possible tantrums and running off, I got a child’s leash. Suffice to say, I got lots of stares and eye daggers for having him leashed to me. LOL. If only the owners of those staring eyes know how energetic and fast my son is, they would applaud me for my futuristic thinking and planning. Also, quite endearing is that he STILL remembers the travel experience now as though it just happened yesterday. It truly gladdens my soul knowing I’m giving him experiences that leave such positive impressions on him. I have promised him that I’ll take him to visit the King of England and we both are looking forward to it.

Going back to the unexpected and expected turns of 2024, during that visit I knew I was pregnant. I hadn’t taken a test but I knew right from the moment I got on the plane that I was. I didn’t bother taking a test or looking out for my period. I just truly believed God that it had happened. And it had.

Shortly after confirming the pregnancy on my return to Canada, I received law school acceptances from all the law schools I had applied to. These were the expected turns because like Daniel in Daniel 6:23, I trusted God for these outcomes and He came through in His faithfulness. The unexpected turns were everything else that happened afterwards. Trials appeared that shook me amidst my testimonies but I held on and I’m still holding on strong knowing the living God I serve.

Pregnancy itself was TOUGH. Phewwwwwww, it was tougher than my first. I threw up until I was 23 weeks pregnant. Violent puking that have left me so scarred. I’ll never forget a puking episode after eating eba and soup. I had erroneously thought I was getting my appetite back so I decided to indulge in said meal. Not even 10mins later, I was head in toilet puking so violently it was coming out of my nostrils. It was so violent, rapid and painful that I couldn’t breathe. The undigested morsels of eba blocked my nostrils and I was gasping for air and crying. I honestly believed, in that moment, I was going to die.

I also bled vaginally for most of the first trimester but I held on to God’s word that He would perfect all He’s started. For the entire pregnancy, I had nausea, metallic taste and zero appetite. At a point in my pregnancy, I was losing weight because of how hard it was to keep anything down. Food, water and EVERYTHING was disgusting from 5 weeks of pregnancy up until I had my second son. However, amidst the physical and mental difficulty of pregnancy plus the trials that bored holes in my spirit, I had joy. God raised me a village of friends and strangers that supported me and made me smile. I truly was never alone even when it seemed like it.

Unlike my first son’s delivery that went on for so long with labour pains that still ended in an emergency c-section, this second delivery was easy. God was with me every step of the way and I smiled and laughed from the moment I walked into the hospital to the moment I was discharged and got home with my baby boy. Honestly, pregnancy, labour and delivery is a miracle that should never be underestimated. I’d always advocate for kindness and love towards women who are pregnant or just had babies. It’s an incredibly sensitive and difficult journey. Support cannot be overemphasized!

Needless to say, I am back (covers eyes). Locs are flourishing. I am healthy and hopeful for the future. God is a constant presence and remains faithful. I don’t know what it is but I feel so odd these past few years posting anything on a public platform. Perhaps I don’t want to open myself up or maybe it’s a distrust of others where I feel I’ll be judged for writing out my feelings and reality. Whatever the case, here’s to trying once more and doing it afraid. Life is too short not to write. It is my destiny to and I won’t fight it anymore.